santa claus is coming to town
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups. In old age, we yearn to be kids. It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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